You know it, suckafishes!

Don’t fear, Nuggeteers, Curtísimo hasn’t changed the site to honeybadgertakeswhathewants.com……… yet.  Honey badger web searches are currently a bit of blogging gold though.  A good 75-80% of the hits on this crap site are currently do to Honey Badger mania!

Saturday
Oklahoma -10 at Texas
The now lone über-marquee game of the dying Big 12-X  sees OU & their wagon train riding high while Texas is sputtering back to some sort of consistency.  But the Sooners are a double digit favorite on the road in Texas?? Ouch, Mack Brown!  But the Big 12-X may be saved for a few years despite Missouri announcing recently they’re actively looking for an SEC invite, by bringing in perennial ringer…. Tulane. LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL.  Tulane…. ummmmm, yep.  Surely future Oklahoma v. Tulane games would be another big game  for Big Game Bob to show his big game prowess.  Lulz!        Oklahoma 34, Texas 21

LSU -13 vs. Florida
Well, as John Brantley pulled his own Prothro-esque “Oh snap!” moment last week against the Pachydermis Sabanensis, Florida comes into Tiger Stadium with a true frosh QB & a couple of Wildcat/Option QBs left in their stables.  To be fair to Tyrone Prothro though, he broke his ankle in a win, Brantley broke his leg in a loss- Prothro moment, ur doing it wrong!  Well, you would have to think the odds are stacked against Florida with their QB situation & Bama showing last week that the Gators’ mighty mite running backs are fairly useless without interstate sized holes to run through & that a physical defense & ground game can get into the heads of the Gators a bit.  Thus with Da Tigahs having the Honey Badger & Coach Les Miles coming into possession of a Papyrus Containing The Spell To Preserve Its Possessor Against Attacks From He Who Is In The Water, you’d have to think it may be blowout city waiting to happen.  But, since JJ Headkicker is back on the team ready to murder Freedom & General Captain Sergeant Lee’s confidence, this game may be closer than the oddsmakers think.  Or not.  Either way,  I’m told there’s only a 20% chance that this game could be 50/50.   So LSU should win Physical Game Of Contact Sport Which Is Played On Grass Rectangular Field In Front Of Massive Crowds.       LSU 23, Florida 7       

As an aside, for all the JJ boo-birds, don’t forget to boo Crocodile Puntee, Brad Wing, this weekend too.  He was arrested for battery in June.  Also, boo Zach Mettenberger, convicted of sexual battery while at Georgia.  Also boo the 50+ other players that broke curfew & specifically the near 20 that were involved in the Shady’s incident.  OR you can just cheer for ALL the Tigers while they are active members of the team.  Shocking concept, I know!


Oi, mos’ people don’t ev’n know I was arrested in June for bat’tr’y!  Good on ya, mate!

Notre Dame -16.5 vs. Air Force
Air Force took a step forward to retaining the Commander-In-Chief’s Trophy last week with their thrilling & controversial overtime winnah! against the Navy Midshipmen.  Notre Dame is coming off back-to-back road crusades, er,victories over the P schools of Pitt & the Kingodm of Prussia.  I mean, Purdue.  16.5 sure seems like a lot of points for the Irish to spot, even at home where the echoes can stir.  Though in recent years, the echoes have just been that- echoes of the past.  I prefer Echoes In The Well, but waddaya gonna do?  Notre Dame’s fall from grace could certainly be a sign of a Corrosion of Conformity…           Notre Dame 31, Air Force 20

Georgia -1 at Tennessee
Don’t look now but this game may go a long way to deciding who’ll end up the SEC East champ.  With USCe struggling & Florida a heavy underdog & facing a monumental task in Tigah Stadium, the Bulldogs of the Georgia variety can take a big step towards the East.  The Eastern crown is there taunting practically everybody in the division but is waiting to be claimed for anybody who remotely shows any consistency.  But as the -1 line for Georgia shows, Tennessee will be plucky.  Though the thing about being plucky is, it’s generally code for you’re not very good; you’ll make it a game but likely to shoot yourself in the foot or make a mistake, even at home at some point. Call me a sucker but I like…          Georgia 23, Tennessee 21

Nebraska -10.5 vs. Ohio St.
Two historical powerhouses limp into this one looking to get back on track after both put in rather dreadful performances.  The Huskers though had the worst of it per se b/c they got beat both in the game & on the scoreboard where as Ohio St. nearly luck into a victory due to Michigan St.’s profligacy in the red zone.   But you would have to think the Huskers definitely are a good bet  at the -10.5 b/c their performance was more of a shot self in the foot type even with the big margin of defeat while the Ohio St. Suckeyes’s offense last week made glacial movements look exciting & fast by comparison. This one could get ugly for Ohio St. although by Midwestern standards sometimes it’s hard to tell.  Midwesterners…. not an attractive people.         Nebraska 31, Ohio St. 14

Virginia Tech -7.5 vs. Miami (FL)
Maaaaaaan ACC foosball.  It’s sucktastic! It’s the anti-NBA slogan of “it’s faaantastic.”  I’m really only picking this game b/c I wanted an even 10 picks this week b/c I have a low-level version of that syndrome where people like rounded #s.  To paraphrase a line from a Cracker song, “the world needs a new ACC conference b/c the old man just bores me to death.”  ZZZZzzzzzzzzz…. hunh? what? ACC? What? Who cares?! It would be just like Miami to cause an upset in this just so the ACC conference could feign competitiveness forcing talking heads to report on it…         Miami (FL) 20, Virginia Tech 17         

The ACC football championship game… only a handful of people give a shit!

Texas A&M -8 at Texas Tech
Despite blowing consecutive double digit 2nd half leads, the latter to a future SEC brethren, Texas A&M should be able to bounce back & deal with the Red Raiders.  In fact, they should start practicing for their future SEC entry by chanting “SEC! SEC! SEC!” following each victory through the rest of year.          Texas A&M 32, Texas Tech 23


SEC, like the Honey Badger takes what it wants!

Arkansas -10 vs. Auburn
Well, I don’t know how they keep doing it but the Crystal Astrerisks keep plugging along with victories.  I guess when you “all in” you can just will yourself to victory with the residual Cash Newtonness.  Don’t know if I can take Arkansas & the -10 despite being at home b/c of their emotional comeback last week in JerraWorld & even with Auburn’s shoddy defensive play this year.         Arkansas 34, Auburn 31

Advertisements
Comments
  1. Shifty Paulson says:

    I hate to tell you this but Oklahoma/Texas has pretty much always been played in Dallas at the Cotton Bowl and this year is no different. Sort it out Chuckles!

  2. curtisimo says:

    And Dallas is this year & always has been in Texas. Sorted enough fer ya, Shifty?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s